Grateful and Tired - An Update

12:56 AM

Hey guys,
I've been wanting to write this post for months now and every time I think about it, I have a million words pouring into my mind but now that I'm actually sitting here trying to write.. I don't know what to say, so I'll just start I guess..
sunset from the hospital room window
Sooo! I've been insanely inactive on the blog, not just this month but this entire year and that is because I made some career choices this year that I'm still not too sure about. I wasn't ready for it but then again, now that I think about it, I don't think you're ever ready to start 'adulting' and the only way to start is to actually just take the leap. And so I did. It's an online job, a writing job. I wish it was something interesting because I really enjoy creative writing but my topics literally could not be more boring!!
travel
But then again, I'm someone who genuinely enjoys being busy and feel like I'm going crazy whenever I have too much time on my hands and blogging was taking quite a bit of time already. I don't know if you guys know, but it takes me more than half a day to fully take tutorial photos that I am happy with and then edit them so the colours look exactly like they do in person as things seem to look a little washed out when photographed sometimes. And then I prepare the blog post, with the instructions or review etc over the next day.
love
While being busy doing something I absolutely love, I decided that I can manage a job as well, because who doesn't want to make their own $$$ haha and I also don't make any sort of profit from this blog, in case you guys were wondering, but as generic as it sounds, I do it because I truly enjoy helping people with makeup, sharing my tips and tricks and interacting with you guys!! That's the best part! Whenever I receive messages, dms or comments saying my tutorials or reviews helped you, it absolutely makes my day! There are a few other jobs I could do that would make me just as happy as blogging, but that's a conversation for another day.
sunset
Anyways! Getting back to the point, I started working the first week of January and It. Has. Been. INTENSE. And there are reasons to that! When you work a normal office job or any other job for that matter, at 5pm or whenever you're done with work, you get to drive home and switch off your mind but that's not the case when you're working from home. 

I have been having the hardest time switching off and bringing my mind back home again because the environment stays the same even after I'm done with work which kind of makes my body feel as though I'm still working. It's a crazy thing but if you work from home, I'm pretty sure you can relate! I could work from another room but I like working where I'm comfortable and I need to feel good when I'm writing 1000s of words per day.
mornings back home
Now! That's update one. So ever since I started working, I've barely had any time to blog and create makeup looks, which is kind of what keeps me alive. I'm an artist at heart and I will forever need a creative outlet to express myself or I feel like I'm a fish out of water and I can't breathe! Which is why I kept announcing that I was taking breaks on Instagram which BTW, thank you so much to everyone who sent me all those sweet messages about taking my time to feel better! So I've been trying to figure out a schedule for myself, so that I can fit in what I love and work and everything else that humans need to do to survive and I knew I would be happy. I had it figured out.
hospital
But then.. my grandma fell ill. Like, really ill. Ill to the point that everyone thought she won't be with us in a week's time. So we had to bring her from my hometown to the capital Colombo, which is where I live and do whatever it takes to save her. She had a little surgery and that story is way too long to explain here.. I don't even know how many of you are still reading, but if you are, thank you! And so, yes. I was spending most of my time in the hospital with her, and when I came back home everyday I only had time to clean, work and sleep. I was also so happy that I didn't have a regular job, because that would never have fit into that schedule! God always has a plan guys! We just can't see it until it's time!
emergency
Anyways, I'm very happy to say, that she's doing okay now all thanks to God, she's recovering and she's staying home with me which I am so so grateful for. God is so powerful. But once again, I've completely lost my balance and I'm trying to figure everything out, figure out a schedule where I can fit one extra thing.
thank God for good friends
That's where I've been guys and I miss everything more than I can describe. So thank you for bearing with me and stay tuned until I finally figure out this puzzle, again. As I wake up every day feeling grateful and tired.

Love you guys and I hope you have a great day.
-Zaha

You Might Also Like

0 comments